After seeing the new moon trailer

R: I have paper cuts. Can I get worker's comp for that?
J: No, but watch out for vampires. Coming at you from across the room. In slow motion.

And then the werewolves open their eyes

Claire: He talks about rape all the time?
Edd: Well yeah but in a comedy way so it's all right

Jenn: If I had a baby I would bite it.

Sex and Violence

Rachel: I was broken and entered by a real estate agent.

Jenn: You spanked me!
Rachel: Yeah, but that was after you beat me.

Guitar Hero

Claire: He's really funny but he's always so serious looking, like he wears shirts.

Jenn: I was all wet and naked, so you know, you're nervous.

Also, pool tables

Seb: It's nice to see a kitchen being used for cooking.

Jenn: As opposed to...

Amy and Rachel *looking at each other*: Sex?

Twilight quotes and then some

Jenn directing Claire: Get off the tube and follow the screaming.

Claire: I wouldn't say 'I want to have your babies,' I just want to have sex with you.

Girl in front of us: Are you Mormon?

Us: Oh god no. awkward pause Why, are you?

Rachel: We're nerdier than Amy

Claire: Oh yeah we're dirtier than Amy, what did she say like when we're talking about our sex lives...

Jenn: Where is he (Robert Pattinson)? Can you see him?

Rachel: I don't... Oh wait! No! I see his hair!

Jenn: Acceptance is the first step

Seb: No, having a drink is the first step.

Walking past a Friend's Meeting House on Euston Rd

Rachel: Maybe I should become a Quaker.

Jenn: Oh, I wouldn't like to be in control of so many lives.

Rachel: Whaaa...

Jenn: Plus the whole suicide thing would freak me out.

Rachel: WHAT???

Jenn: Remember we were talking about people jumping in front of trains?

Rachel: What... does that have to do with Quakers?

Jenn: Oh, I thought you said tube driver.

Rachel: It's only when I started to ship them in my head. pause I am my own fandom.

Rachel: throwing houses on the monopoly board What? I don't have a degree in urban design.

Seb: Nothing is completely evil. Even the Wehrmacht made good cars.

Kaite: I'm very gay but I'm attracted to guys like David Tennant. If he asks very nicely, I would have sex with him. pause I'm David Tennant-sexual.

Claire: If you google Claire you'll find chocolate wrappers.

Nick: Dairy. Dairy is good.

Amy [?]: But it's so broad.

Nick: And Christianity isn't?

Seb: Notch, notch, notch

Rachel: Was she counting her conquests on your knife?

Seb: It's not long enough.

If there was any doubt about our nerd status...

Claire: So it's like... I want to give up my life and my soul so I don't get older than Robert Pattinson?

Rachel: Actually, it's Edward Cullen, but yeah.

Claire: It makes more sense if it's Robert Pattinson.

Seb *explaining why he can't write sex scenes*: Also, my main characters are 15.

Rachel: You could have flash forward into the future sex...?

Claire: Like the epilogue in Harry Potter? But with sex?

Claire: This is so awesome! Thanks for putting the idea in my head

Rachel: What idea?

Claire: Nano. [pause] Also, Julia Quinn.

Kaite *on the phone*: Speaking of sex, I'm in the middle of writing of threesome.

Claire: That was like the third time I'd seen him and he was like CRAZY, like maybe he was Stefanie Meyers' dad...

Claire: You should say it's the guy who blesses people on the Victoria line, because I'm sure people know him.

Claire: Do you know wizard rock?

Kaite: *shakes head*

Claire [business-like] oh, okay, we need to do that.

Seb: Why is it quarter to eight already?

Kaite: Jesus!

Seb: Naw, I don't think he did it.

Seb: I can't remember from our discussion last year. Is it cheating if your character has the same dream twice?

Rachel: No! Come on. Haven't you read Order of The Phoenix?

Jenn: She's pregnant, so she had to at least have dabbled...

Rachel: Well, her husband was abusive....

Jenn: Okay, dabbled or raped, those are the options.

Quote round up (nanowrimo love scene edition)

Rachel: What did we ever do before the internet?

Seb: I'll ask Google.

Claire (to Nimbus): If you want hurt someone just write a novel. You can kill undergraduates. 

Seb (on the quick quotes quill): That would be awesome. "And then stuff happens." Fifteen minutes later you'd have Twilight.

Jenn: So you were planning social entrapment on JK Rowling?

Amy: ... Basically yes.

Claire: I forcered her awake by being awake

Jenn: She forced me awake by talking incessantly

Claire: That's what I call being awake

Jenn: She had sex last year.

Rachel: Well, I kind of lied.

Seb: Did you lie up or did you lie down?

Rachel: I lied down.... hey....

Claire *excitedly*: I learned how to conjugate the verb 'thrust'!

Claire: Now I wish I hadn't sent you the sex scene.

Rachel: *reading the aforementioned sex scene*: "Complete this scene?"

Claire: Well yeah it needs to be finished, you know

Everyone else: *bursts into laughter*

James: What kind of sex are you having that lasts 4,000 words? And where can I get it?

Claire: Someone said you were a bad influence.

Rachel: What?!

Jenn: No one said that. She doesn't understand English very well.

Rachel: I've got an epilogue and a sexilogue.

Jenn: Have you written your climax scene then?

The results are in

Random American: Where are you from?

Seb: Brighton. The only state that can't vote.

American: Ah, the US of K.

Jenn: Who pours liquid in a cup?

Seb: What was I doing?

Rachel: Defriending all your friends who voted for prop 8?

Seb: I don't have any of those

Rachel: Neither do I. They're all family.

Seb:Easier to get rid of then.

Some more

Claire (as Rita Skeeter): So what magazines do you read?

Rachel (as Sarah Palin): Oh you know, all of 'em.

Rachel: Are you sleeping?

Jenn (lying on the floor in the middle of the hallway): No.

Rachel: Are you meditating?

Jenn: No.

Rachel: Are you studying the ceiling?

Jenn: No. I'm trying to decide what special powers the stone will have.

Claire: We could host a write in at our place
Rachel: potluck dinner
Claire: potluck? What smoking lucky pot?

Taboo and novel-writing

Jenn: It's a very stereotypical thing that [French people] wear on their heads.

Lefke: A baguette? 

Jenn: Where does the wine come from?

Claire: A graveyard?

Jenn: Rachel is this by virue of having no... guardians

Lefke: An orphan?

Seb: What's wrong with Harry Potter?

Rachel: [word: saddle shoes] After sneaker I was like 'fuck that shit' and I moved on

Lefke [word: surgery]: You might not live through it

Jenn: Death

Lefke: [word: toothfairy] It collects your bodily parts.

Jenn: [word: stubble] George Clooney has this on his lower region & under his mouth 

Claire: Gorgeousness.

Lefke: [two hours after playing Taboo] I don't even know what Taboo is.

Rachel: Well, they might have sex, just not on screen.

Seb: If it doesn't happen on screen it doesn't happen, no matter what Harry and Ginny shippers say.

Couchsurfers = nerds

Jenn: Did you want the wedding ring instead of the pearl earrings? Because I would think that the earrings are more wearable.

Amy: Can we watch Land Before Time clips on youtube?

Claire: He's a magical toad. Why does Wormtail get to live and Trevor the Toad has to die?
Rachel: Because Wormtail is an actual person and...
Claire: Wormtail's not a person, he's a... jerk.

It's time to ask some hard questions about our relationships with animals

Colleague: Spider genitals could be sexy to some...

Jenn: Maybe you taste bad to lions if you're a Jehovah's Witness

Return to London

Jenn: Hey maybe we'll get drunk at the Obama thing.

Jenn: Do you know what a funnel cake is?
Rachel: YES!
Jenn: Not you. I was asking the UK people.
UK people: *shake heads*

Jenn: A Renaissance faire is like America's version of England.
Seb: Yeah we call it a street.

Eurovision: we are wolves of the sea

Presenter: Welcome to our Europe-long party

Terry Wogan (British commentator): "Gel-ena" (Jelena)

Jessie: Doesn't this remind you of the Sesame Street song?
Rachel: "all night long"? (Denmark)

Jenn: Maybe she's blind
Seb: That would explain the dress (Georgia)

Seb: That's the 'dear Vlad don't send the tanks in' vote. (Ukraine for Russia)

Rachel: The Irish love pirates (Ireland for Latvia)

Jenn: Russia has iceskates and political voting... so they win.

Russian entry: You are incredible... because of us.

How do you exist?

"How can I be a bridge if you people don't even know your own countries?" -- Jenn, the anglo-american
"So what's x-factor?" --Seb

World Cup 2010

R: Can you drink all day?
J: Yes. basically you just watch football matches and drink all day.
R: I could go for that. How is it different from reading romance novels and drinking all day? [pause] No sex?
J:Well, there's a lot of guys, I think we can work that in.